Had a super long convo with the mother. Lady actually knew I was crushing around since Day 1, but kept quiet about it to save my ego. Teehee. Can't fool her.
She agreed I made a good choice to give it up though. And she's proud of me for that. We went a little more in-depth after that, but I guess I won't touch too much on that here... it can be pretty controversial teehee.
Talked to her about the infidelity issue.
"I can't do it. I keep on jumping ship."
"You gotta have willpower. These temptations isn't gonna end even if you get married. You'll have to keep on rejecting these distractions. This is responsibility. When people talk about having responsibility in relationships, this is exactly what it means. You're responsible for maintaining this bond."
And she gave me this look that told me she really understood my problems. That told me I wasn't alone as a flutterfly.
So I'm sitting here now, typing, thinking about my current situation. What am I doing, treating this as some kind of game? Oh, I need some spice in my life, maybe getting a fling might do the job? Hey, boyfriend for a day? Will you still be proud of me if you ever came to know about this one day?
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