haven't been talking to sean for days, due to some MSN server fault in the west.
could only bitch to each other through short facebook messages. fuck long distance restrictions, man.
we've been rocking this joshua+me kind of bond for a long while now... and I'm kind of happy it turned out that way :O
It's perfectly awesome being friends, because the urge to change each other is gone. No more stress. We could be all childish and annoying again, hell yeaaaah
...with that said.
SHIT
DUMB MSN
WORK, DAMN IT.
DON'T FORCE ME TO RETURN TO S*T
4 comments:
D: how does being in a relationship make you want to change the other party? I thought it was about true acceptance, being annoying and childish included. LOL.
The way I treat partners...
I want them to be the best partner anyone will ever have. Essentially, I wanted perfection :O
But once the whole soulmate business was dropped, the stress went with it too.
I see relationships on an extremely practical level :/ When Anne was talking to me about loving people without understanding why the hell you love that person, I was going huh-wtf-you-talking deep down inside
Though it did highlight the way I'm treating this thing; Love isn't an investment, I shouldnt behave as such. Maybe I really am planning too far into things.
Oh damn, I understand Anne's stand on that one. There's actually no real reason you can speak of when you like/love someone, i suppose.
It's a feeling or a bunch of 'em, instinct, intangible and positive stuff. When you like someone, you put their happiness and welfare before yours, and care for them just because. Plus you enjoy their company no matter how annoying or serious they are. I think.
Not something you can measure or put down in words, and definitely not something you seek to get things out of. :o
Same goes for friendship, actually. :o
If there are so many reasons,
then you know there's gotta be something wrong. Like if you're in it just because you're lonely,
or because you're too physically attracted to them, or obsessed or wanting to return gratitude,
or for practically's sake - what they can do for you in future, Hrm hrm. D:
It's not that you're planning too far ahead. More like, you're expecting too much. (Here i go again) If you do that, sooner or later you'll find yourself having a mental list of things/qualities you want in a partner. And that's kinda dumb. D: You're just limiting yourself and not giving potential people a chance to show you how awesome they are. Because you're so blinded by 'getting the 'perfect one' - those top in their fields etc, who probably either don't really exist, or you realise in time that being top doesnt guarantee they don't have shitty personalities.
That equation adds up to being really really lonely and alone in future. Sad but true. :S
Heehee
i still have a long way to go...
still learning.
hopefully
i can hit true enlightenment without causing any more pain to anyone else.
i wasnt as plucky when i was young
but as i got older, saw more things, experienced more stuff
i realized my standards went up with it too
is this what happens when people get jaded???
too lazy to try and feel again
hahaha
i'll keep on waiting for that one guy who'll give me butterflies again, i guess
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