magnolia

so I went on a final shopping spree and got myself a cork board, among other things.
pinning the little souvenirs from the past proved to be more reminiscent of the old times than I thought. haha

7 movies in all, over these 4 months
1 grad show
1 cycling trip over at pasir ris
countless dinners
and little individual meetups, shopping trips, chillax sessions

this post graduation break... it all ends hereeee
it's high time i moved on to the next stage of life
I'm already one month late, haha

I'm sorry this gap month(s) can't go on forever

I'm sorry I can't force my heart to go with my head
Sometimes I feel like the biggest idiot on earth
But
I don't know
I just can't
lol.
I'm an idiot.

Was thinking about shifting things back to normal
then I realized
I don't even know what 'normal' stands for in this situation. Honestly lol.
before everything exploded, there was no contact whatsoever
Is this the 'normal' status things are defaulting to?
Does this count as friendship?

How did everything happen, again?

??

So much questions
But I still ended up never talking about it
As usual

I'll look at seanana and his potential lady friend
and I'm like
daaaammn
why can't I be more like him
so smooth, so focused
so... lucky
lol.

I don't wanna cause anyone anymore trouble
but I get the feeling a lot of loose ends aren't tied up yet
for me, for a few others

Could let everything settle and disappear under the dust
Like the past
But that's the loser's way out, isn't it
it isn't really fair to everyone
if so
what should i really do, lol


tell me

.