-15-

Talked to semi ytd, on midnight or something. Told me a story about a boy, his cher and some grass thingy.

One day a boy told his cher that he felt useless.
Then his cher brought him to a field full of dandelions.
He told he boy to only walk straight, and pick the nicest looking one.
The boy walked straight, and saw a pretty one.
He thought that there might be a better looking dandelion,and kept on walking.
In the end, he found out that he reached the end..
With no other routes to take.

was quite blown away. lol. moral of the story: be contented with what you have. be contented that i can have such a happy time tgt ..but when it ends and you have to pay the price, you have to do it. not with pain and sadness. but.. yea. the opposite. i dunno if i can or not. lol. but ill try~

Im still quite.. tortured over here..lol. have to stick 24/7 to the com if i want to talk. cant do anything. feel useless. -refers to story- argh. trying to stay as positive as i can be le.. but sometimes my emotion still takes over. then i get scolded for crying over it. how the hell am i gunna let out my frustration then? im already doing my best to convert my thinking..but it takes time and A LOT of effort de wad.

i understand that i cant stick to anyone 24/7 and treat him/her as a replacement. hell no, even if i wanted to. its just not the same. lol.

i have to rely on myself this time round.. problem is.. i dont know how.