i just found out something O:
im in this state because i deserved it wahaha.
today woke late and decided not to go orientation thingy, even if go.. have to return home to teach in half hours time. but i feel so damn guilty sia. i turned on the alarm, but i turned it off when i woke ..and.. fell asleep again. yay.
then it hit me.
whenever i meet some obstacles ill back down and try to drown my guilty feelings by doing something i like. in this case, in every case, i used the computer. i could go.. but i decided not to. i always take the easy way out =/ is this right? well, for me.. i would say yea. who wants a tough day? but it sounds so wrong. so i just .. shook everything off and played the com.
its like drugs lol. i kept taking it to numb myself, and when the effect wears off, the pain returns. double. >_>
im nowhere near ending this .. cycle.
bah.
dont care.
useless talking about it anyway. no difference.
rushed through ss project. and thats abt it. was hell teaching, dun wan elaborate. saw mvp moonlightflower (?) and nearly got pwned by her bad. i only managed to take 1% off her hp WITH aid of other mages. but i was amazed all the same.
how can yellow appear so.. mysterious zomg. i like ragnarok's art. korean art = pwnage. was in a very very very bad mood today.. but now it has subsided. abit.
its so So SO hard trying to change personalities, trust me =/ i cant do it T-T
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