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New favourite word of the day : " awww ". I dont know why, but me and my friends are spamming it in every situation possible.

I was totally.. shocked today. wtf. was very very VERY ashamed of myself actually. ): minette saw the tagboard and asked me about it. i took a step back and went " woah ", not because that she knew, but because she even bothered to ask. LOL. Everything was so weird, its like, ..

i dont talk to sabrina, but today i did.
i dont really greet shark, but today i did.
i got distant from pawan and kenny, but we went back to our usual habit of eating waffles after school with jiahui O: .
i never walked to the other side of the class, but today i did. -well, forced to. collect money. not counted i guess-
i never talked in the morning, but today i did.

today is the best day of all, though very tiring.

i can sob buckets over it lol. so.. touched. thats why i kept laughing and giggling when i saw pks. ok, not really, but it made up 70% of the factors. >] its like, Yo guys, nothing happened, we're still us. nothing changed. ^^

i found out my weakness lol. without friends im nothing. without mental supports im nothing. you can spam all you want, im a deformed little baby, im a saddist, i suck, whatever. yes i admit i got quite affected but it went away the moment i talked to them. and its still not wearing off. (:

hahaha, to my friends, thanks. thanks for trusting me. for sticking up for me. and .. most importantly, believing in me~! i owe everyone a hug. claim the hug when you spot me.

Mr lim said you are actually being brave by committing suicide. haha, for you have to battle the feeling inside you when you jump. and yes, hes actually true la. last time in depression de shi hou, i was like "die die die". but the other part of my mind was " wah stop pls, pain pain pain!" and i was only at the.. safe part. a thin line only. -.- then from there .. i somehow.. dragged myself out of the shadow lor.

it really hurts la, but im glad the pain is behind me now. i feel so stupid omg. soo, yes. no way am i allowing history to repeat itself.

and btw, THE MOMENT I GET A BF, ILL SMUSH HIM UP YOUR FACES WHILE CLINGING TO HIM LIKE A KOALA. -_- im still feeling very insulted. but i guess i wont, feels so bad. treating them like object like that. but i guess nothing is impossible with permission given. :/LOLS. joking la. but im quite serious abt clearing my name.. somehow..

-btw- rest of my post got acci deleted by my itchy fingers. lazy update. will do if im bored enough. but its mostly just stuff abt my msn chats. (: